When WE Love

Now that the seasons of Power and Insecure have come to a close and we have to wait an entire year to find out if Molly is still messing with ole’ girl’s husband, if Issa and Lawrence are gonna EVER get back together, and why Tasha stopped messing with Lawyer dude (What’s his name again?)….It’s a PERFECT time to talk about the portrayal of Black women in these narratives.

What I found to be interesting and unsettling while watching and reflecting on both of these jaw dropping, entertaining, hilarious, sitting on the edge of my seat shows…is that they seem to portray black women as “disloyal”.

With Molly messing with another woman’s husband, Issa cheating on Lawrence, and Tasha cheating on her husband with HIS LAWYER…it seems as if the narrative of Black women not being able to be trusted is a common thread.

Is that it? Or does the portrayal of these women seem to say something about the complicated nature of love and the effect of failed relationships and relationship complications?

Makes you think, doesn’t it? Most of you will say it’s the latter and that these characters don’t challenge the narrative that black women are loyal. Most of you will say that these black women were loyal until they were pushed into not being and their love was taken for granted. (Touche’) However, think of it like this!

Well…Molly has no excuse! Molly is disloyal, PERIOD. The fact is that she knows Dro is married and she should not be involved with a married man, whether he claimed he was in an open marriage or not! Who is she being disloyal to? HIS WIFE and HER SELF! I firmly believe that as a woman I owe it to other women to be loyal to them and not betray them because one of the deepest pains is betrayal! Knowing that your husband has been cheating on you with another woman, but also a woman that you know and has SMILED IN YOUR FACE….let’s not go there. I won’t go on my rant! Let’s just say…nah, not cool EVER!


But Molly is also being disloyal to herself! Because deep down, she knows that the temporary satisfaction that she’s receiving, is not something that she really wants. Countless times, this season she’s told Dro that their relationship wasn’t a good idea and you could see the contemplation on her face, however, she continues to go against what she knows is right and continues to do what she knows is wrong! Ultimately, she’s hurting herself because she will never be the ONE and his wife will always come first, which results in her disappointment and unhappiness.

As for Issa…one of the best scenes of this season was on the final episode. She stands in the empty apartment that she was moving out of. The apartment held way to many memories of her and Lawrence’s relationship and the cost was becoming to much for her to handle. As she takes her final look around, she turns toward the kitchen and to her surprise she finds Lawrence standing there waiting for her. But one of the best parts of this scene is her confessing that she was wrong for cheating on him when he was going through a hard time. Yes, he didn’t have a job. Yes, he forgot her birthday. Yes, he seemed to be lazy and feeling sorry for his self ALL THE TIME. But as his girl, she should have been motivating, encouraging, and lifting him up daily. In this scene, Lawrence and Issa finally have the much needed, mature, and reflective conversation and you could see the realness and sincerity in their words and Issa finally opens up.


Lawrence: I’m sorry for not being who you expected me to be. Who I expected me to be.

 Issa: Lawrence I wanted to be better for you….When you were going through what you were going through I just didn’t know how to handle it

Lawrence: I mean…what could you have done though?

Issa: MORE…you needed me to be better for the BOTH OF US! And I didn’t even know how to do that for myself….What I did was the worst thing I could have ever done to you!

The phrase “You needed me to better for the BOTH of us”, is loyalty, its real, its complicated…but its love! Issa should have been there as a rock!



Finally, Tasha! When you marry someone apart of the vows are “Til death do us part” (right?) Therefore, no matter how much Ghost cheated on Tasha, Tasha should have diligently worked to make her marriage work or she should have filed for divorce. Because girl if that ring is still on that finger, then your loyalty lies with your husband and you definitely shouldn’t be cheating on him with his driver or his lawyer! (Oh no baby, what is you doing?)Because Tasha decided not to get a divorce and to stay in an unhappy non-existent marriage, then it is still her duty to be loyal to her husband, right?

When we Love…when does being loyal become too much? When does your loyalty stop? Does it ever? Is it too much to come by now of days?

As a Black woman who feels as if television constantly portrays negative characteristics of black womanhood (ESPECIALLY ON “REALITY TELEVISION”), I challenge you to think back on these characters and ask yourself if these characters are doing the same thing. Think back on what loyalty means to you. Think about the perception of Black womanhood. I challenge you to have a conversation with me about what you think! Is it even about Black womanhood or womanhood, in general? Or it just human emotion and reactions?







13 Comments Add yours

  1. kemkem says:

    I think TV thrives on portraying black women in a negative way. It is damaging and l don’t like watching any reality shows as a whole. I hope it gets better at some near point.


  2. dawnwairimu says:

    hm very interesting. i dont watch much reality TV but it’s sad that black women are portrayed negatively in reality tv. this seriously needs to improve.


  3. I don’t watch Insecure bit I do watch Power. I hated that Tasha seemed to just fall for whatever man was looking at her! I do think drama sells and this is why is the black woman as bad guy gets so much play.


  4. I’ve missed all of this. I haven’t caught an episode yet, but it’s all I keep reading about right now.


  5. I agree with the earlier comment that television thrives off the portrayal of negative stereotypes of black women. It is no better in African movies and television episodes. A broken woman sells shows. People want to see an empowered woman of color but some still want to see them in their “so-called place” when it comes to personal relationships on television.


  6. Kita says:

    I don’t watch any of these shows. They sound good and sound like real life for some people.


  7. Kiwi says:

    Honestly some of these black women narratives gotta go. We are not disloyal but I feel its either being disloyal or we are some crying sulking never gonna find a man ever type of story. I want a strong black woman story where she gets the man because she dont take any mess, smart, ambition and a man willing to court her without cheating or making her feel insecure. I hope that can be a image of that type of black relationship and love on the tv screen again.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I know exactly what you mean! We used to have this image! One that keeps popping in mind is Clair Huxtable, but I definitely wish this image was the norm and not what we are seeing now of days.


  8. mimicutelips says:

    I watch and enjoy both shows. Although Tasha cheated with the lawyer I never felt like she was portrayed as disloyal. If anything I felt like she was too loyal to a man that wasn’t faithful to her.

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Tiffany H. says:

    I have not watch either show, so thanks for a glimpse into the show. I think loyalty becomes to much, when the person isnt loyal to you. Whether it be cheating, or not giving you enough time, being emotionally unattached, abusive and the list could go on. I do wish they we had more positive shows but I guess its reality because it is somebodies reality, somebody is a Tasha, Molly, Issa which is why so many people may be able to relate.


  10. I have never watched any of these series. They seem quite interesting and filled with love and relationship issues.


  11. Olivia says:

    Definitely a spoiler post! I haven’t watched this season!


  12. MUAKimPorter says:

    I haven’t watched the last season of Insecure so I can’t comment on it. I can’t understand why Tasha is expected to be loyal to her disloyal husband. Television shows, the media, period, is constantly portraying black people as a whole in a negative light.


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